Your CartTo say family structures have changed dramatically over the years is an understatement. Once, the most common family structure was a married man and woman with kids. The man was considered the breadwinner of the family while the wife tended to the home and children. Wow, have times have changed!
Today, we now see more blended families after a divorce or death; same-sex relationships/marriages; cohabitation without marriage; single parent families; unmarried co-parenting families; multigeneration living together in one home while sharing expenses and family duties; and the list goes on.
All of these family structures need to be taken into…
Author's Insights
This section provides information relating to topics covered in the organizer. Additional insights will be posted weekly.
If you have a question or would like to see a certain topic covered, send a note to the author through the contact page.
Predawn Ponderings
posted on April 4, 2022
Predawn Ponderings – This morning I woke up before dawn and could not shut my mind down. This past week, a dear friend of mine passed away. She was 20 years older than I and she has been an important part of my life for well over 20 years. Our friendship arose out of a caregiving situation that blossomed into a deep friendship. Sometimes the relationship seemed more like a mother/daughter relationship. She gave me advice, support, and a few times, a dose of reality. Other times, the relationship was more of a girlfriend-like relationship. Lots of gabbing! We could talk for hours about everything and nothing! Other times our relationship…
Category:
Other
An Act of Love
posted on April 4, 2022
The other day I was having a conversation with someone in their 40's who was astonished that people people would want to fill out my organizer, When The Time Comes. “Who wants to think about death or something bad happening?” “It is such an unpleasant thought.” “So morbid!”
As the conversation proceeded, I explained that I didn't see the organizer as a book about death in the morbid sense they referred to.
For me, filling out the organizer was an act of love for those who will be left to see to my needs while I am living, but physically unable to care for myself. No one wants or plans for a stroke to happen, or a devastating and…
Category:
Having "The Talk"
Tax Preparation
posted on April 4, 2022
One thing we know for sure, the vast majority of people pay some type of tax and need to file yearly tax returns. Income tax, personal property tax, real estate tax, Federal tax, State tax, City tax, County tax, business tax, sales tax and the list go on and on. Many dread the end of the year because it is the time we start compiling and organizing the information needed to send off to our accountant or to sort through for yourself to be able to file your taxes with the appropriate agencies. Often, it is a task managed by one person in the family.
Now, imagine that next year that person is no longer able to do this task because of a serious…
Category:
Legal and Accounting
Guns and other personal property
posted on March 30, 2022
I have always appreciated feedback from folks who have purchased my binder, When The Time Comes. Recently, a person who is taking their time and diligently going through each section of the binder, came across something that I had not addressed.
She shared that as she was completing a particular section in the binder it dawned on her that there was no place to list the serial numbers for guns her husband had collected over the years. This spurred additional conversation regarding permits to carry, combinations to lock boxes, where guns are stored (as well as ammunition), history of the gun (it may have been passed down from relatives or…
Category:
Home, Vehicle and Personal Property
Having "the talk" during family gatherings
posted on March 30, 2022
We are nearing the end of another year filled with uncertainty due to COVID-19. Much progress has been made over the past 2 years, but we are still losing too many people, young and old, to this pandemic. The unexpected deaths of loved ones have had a tremendous impact on families. My heart and thanks go out to all the healthcare workers who have been on the front line of caring for COVID patients around the clock for the past two years. Caring for individuals and their families during this crisis has taken a toll on our nurses, doctors, patient technicians and all the healthcare workers involved in providing the intensive care so many have…
Category:
Having "The Talk"
Elder Abuse
posted on March 30, 2022
Over the years, I have been asked hundreds of questions regarding healthcare concerns for aging parents. People may ask about care for a parent with dementia. How to select a long term care facility? What services can be brought into the home to assist their parents? Questions relating to end of life concerns.
I have also been asked questions regarding how to address issues with parents who refuse to talk about aging or end of life plans. Aging parents who refuse to discuss money, estate plans, or whether a will, power of attorney or trust has been established. It may be a reluctance of aging parents to share ANY information with their…
Category:
Other
General Information Needed
posted on March 30, 2022
Why is it important to have all the details listed under the General Information section of the binder filled out? You will find that this information is the foundation for almost every phone call or inquiry someone will be making on behalf of another person. Date of birth; city of birth; social security number; mother's maiden name; other names used (initials, maiden name, previous marriage, adoption); parents' names; etc. will be at your fingertips and will save time searching through papers while they are on the phone or in someone's office. There are many documents that you will also need to have readily available. Birth, death and…
Category:
General Info and Contacts
The importance of "the talk"
posted on March 7, 2022
I want to share with you stories that I have heard over and over again while working with families facing end of life issues or actually trying to close an estate. The story changes somewhat from each individual's experience who shares it, but the circumstances or gist of the story is almost always the same.
Here are a few of the stories:
...Dad would never talk to Mom or us kids about his finances. He paid all the bills, took care of the insurance, handled the investments and would tell us all it wasn't any of our business. Now he is gone and Mom doesn't have a clue where to begin. His death was so unexpected and Mom is grief-ridden.…
Category:
Having "The Talk"